Or not.

I came to the very difficult decision last week that I cannot make the trip right now. I have had extreme difficulty in finding someone to rent my house and someone to adopt Max. I had other issues with finances and health, and I finally realized that the timing simply wasn't right.

It took a lot of prayer, a lot of journaling, a lot of tears, and a lot of support from many people for me to recognize this.

So I'm not going to India, yet. The school takes a group of students either to Ecuador or to India every  January, and this coming January is the trip to India. I will be able to transfer my flights to go on this trip, so I don't lose all that money spent on travel, and I'll still get to see India. It won't be the same experience as spending six months there, but it'll be something, and I'll be able to maintain my sanity in the meantime.

I'm disappointed and sad, yes, but I'm also at peace with the decision. It wasn't for lack of trying that things didn't work out. I was so convinced that everything had come together in the beginning because I was meant to go. I've realized since then that almost everything that happened after those first two weeks indicated the timing was wrong, and I just refused to see it. Once I decided it was best for me to regroup and stay here for now, it was like a weight had been lifted from my chest, and I could breath freely again--and it had nothing to do with my asthma. I know it's the right thing for me, right now.

There are other exciting things coming up in my life. I'm looking forward to seeing what comes next. I have been working hard on seeking new experiences and pushing my boundaries in all kinds of ways. India will have to wait, but there's a whole lot of other wonderful things in store.

Now I just have to hope I can get a decent field placement. I really don't want to do school social work....

I leave in seven days.

Karma

Facebook folks may have seen this already, but wow. The two things I have been most anxious about regarding leaving for India were resolved in one go this afternoon: Max is being adopted by the person who will be moving into my house when I leave. While he was checking out the house (which he said he wanted after only seeing the yard!), I asked, as I have asked just about every person I've met over the past several weeks, if he wanted another dog. Turns out he's the director of the K-9 unit for Baltimore County Police and was looking for a smaller dog to join his German Shepherd and Dutch Shepherd police dogs. My biggest concern about finding Max a new home is that she needs someone who is a strong and consistent trainer. Since he trains police dogs, I'm thinking Max has found her perfect partner.

Oh, and he wants any furniture I don't want to keep, so I don't even have to worry about moving it! Seeing as I hate moving as much as I hate pickles, I might (did) have done a little happy dance right there on the spot.

When I told him he had just relieved every worry I have had about this trip that can be relieved, he said he is a strong believer in karma. Well, Officer, you're about to get overwhelmed with wonderful things. I wonder what I did recently.

Ten days. I am so blessed.

 

My people: One month from now, our country will celebrate its 500th anniversa--


Wait. That's not it. That's a line from the greatest movie ever. Let me try again.

One month from now, I will be in route to India. Holy cow. How is this happening again? I swear sometimes I feel like I don't have any control over my life. I won't complain though--whoever is controlling the strings got me a 6 month trip to India to help, experience, learn. And a whole lot of other amazing things.

I suppose I should apply for my visa tomorrow. And start packing the house. And find someone to take over the lease. And find someone to adopt Max. And find someone to foster Val. Fortunately, I've found someone to foster Sheetrock.


Also, Max is following Val in circles around the coffee table. Val has a chew toy, and Max wants it. They're on lap number five, just slowly walking round and round, Val with the bone hanging half out of her mouth and Max right on her heels in case Val decides to give it up. My girls are awesome. I'm really going to miss them.

How did this happen again?

I'm in grad school for my MSW. I'm just finishing up my foundation year field placement at Legal Aid Bureau. Our applications for our advanced year field placements were due February 1. My plan was to do the Title IV-e program for my advanced year field placement. I'd complete my internship at DSS in child welfare, receive a stipend and tuition remission, and have an essentially guaranteed job after graduation. Awesome, right? Right.

But no. The state decided to cut the program's budget a week after the last minute (meaning after applications were due and everyone else had started interviewing and receiving their placements). Now, only foundation year students were eligible to enter the program. So I was left with options to work either in a school (no interest in school social work, thank you) or at an organization with whom I have significant moral objections. Awesome, right? Wrong. 

And then our field liaison/adviser came out to meet with the four of us interning at LAB. She happens to be in charge of the Title IV-e program, and so she knew I was one of the folks who had affected by the state's poorly timed announcement. At that meeting, I discovered she was also in charge of the India Field Placement program. On a whim, expecting nothing but a raised eyebrow and a big fat 'no', I asked if I could just apply for the India program since I wasn't going to get any of my top choice placements.

To my considerable shock(which still hasn't gone away) , she said yes. She said they had ten students already (who applied back in November), but she didn't see why I couldn't be an alternate if someone wasn't able to go. She gave me the information and told me to submit my application as soon as possible and to attend the orientation meeting the following week.

I did both, and at the orientation (which I nearly skipped, as I had a lot of work to do that day and figured my chances of actually going were slim to none), she told me she'd talked about it with the others coordinating the program and they had decided that they could make room for an additional student. I interviewed a few days later and was accepted into the program. Within a week and a half, I went from having a field placement I was utterly uninterested in but within a couple of miles from home to a field placement eight thousand, six hundred and thirteen miles away, in a country I'd never been to, where they speak a few dozen languages I have probably never even heard of, much less am able to understand or speak.

Now I have to find temporary homes for the animals, get out of my lease early, and get whatever shots/medications my doctor and I agree on. Packing for India will be a lot easier than packing up the house, since I plan to bring only my traveling backpack and maybe a messenger bag. I can get nearly everything there, and for far less money than here. Plus, the clothes I can get there will be far more suitable to the weather than what I currently have.  


Time to go back to looking at what diseases I could catch and what places I need to make sure I see before I come home. Just kidding, Mom. There are no diseases I could catch. It's perfectly safe.

It's official.

I'm going to India. Six weeks ago, something like this wasn't featured in my wildest dreams. But two nights ago, I purchased my plane tickets (ouch). I'll be spending six months (and five days) in Kerala, studying and completing my advanced year field placement at Rajagiri College in Kochi. 

I will get to ride an elephant.













I'm putting this here because I keep forgetting details. Now I'll be able to find it more easily. And you get to see it, if for some reason you care.